79 Comments

okay wow this post is landing (#21!!!!!)

why does climate change need a rebrand?! I’m afraid of what I’m missing

3. nachos are scary af bc the only good ones were at a restaurant in flagstaff called criollo that is now closed

9. As someone kinda now working with AI, I promise it’s not a golden teat

22. YOU CANT FOOL ME

I AM GRATEFUL FOR YOU but also scared I won’t get my writing off the ground again okay let’s talk yep

1052. Working too much

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Obv I’m not Alex (lol) but personally I think it needs to be rebranded as something like... EARTH CRISIS - THIS IS NOT A DRILL and always written in all caps specifically

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I think the solution to many of these fears is that we all Unsubscribe at once and make Alex confront himself. (Don't worry we can all subscribe again tomorrow because we know we don't want to miss out on these fun posts) but it sure would be funny to see his face in the morning when his numbers are so down.... sorry, I'm just an old person and we have really serious fears because we have already failed at life so that got several of those on the list out of the way. Now my biggest fear is losing at chess. I confront it every day and it gets NO better. Yeah, the big trucks is still a thing though.

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Great idea--- 700 ChatGPT employees pulled this trick and it worked.

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I'm too old to understand this comment but it sounds excellent thank you ha ha!!

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How patient you are! My question is.... did it help the board confront their fears? ha ha.

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I only vaguely understand all the twists and turns in that saga, but apparently ... it's complicated? (It ended up with the ousted executives returning to OpenAI.)

Loved this: "I'm just an old person and we have really serious fears because we have already failed at life so that got several of those on the list out of the way." YES. Also as an oldster, I've spent the past two years ruminating over many of my major failures and some mid-level ones, too.

And am at the point where I'm, now and then, able to just say this: "I will always have regrets, but I only have so many years left, and am trying, day-by-day, to make the world better in small ways ... before time runs out." I have good days and bad ones, along that path. But am still getting up each morning with some tiny bit of hope left.

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Oh Aron I hear you mate! Oldsters unite ha ha. I have totally and utterly fucked up, got it completely wrong and now I am so FREE. I guess I needed to make all those mistakes to get here so therefore.... shit, that means.... I was right all along. Praise be!

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Here is a poem in which I have an exclusive interview with Death, so I hope that helps ha ha

https://open.substack.com/pub/writewhalley/p/poem-one-more-day-audio?r=1e6bcc&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web

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OMG... my soul twin! hahhahha!!!

" I'm just an old person and we have really serious fears because we have already failed at life so that got several of those on the list out of the way..." I think I love you April! 😂

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Ha ha ha ha.... excellent! We have found each other at last. Let's subscribe to each other and make ourselves feel successful right at the finishing post! That's if you like someone who swears a lot and writes Anarchy Poetry? Also I try to keep under 40 subscribers so I regularly chuck a few out in case it all goes to my head or something!

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hahhahha... Just subscribed... You're a Brit! Yayyy!!! And you're funny!

My kids started a swear jar when my grandkids were born. I swore so much that I'm now paying their college tuitions! Do not ask how much I'm paying. I will cry, and think of all the ways I'd enjoy spending that $$ on travel or clothes or SPAS... sigh

Sometimes I ask myself, "how bad would it be to just let them be ignorant?" And that makes me think of tRump supporters, so nope.

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It is your duty to secretly teach your grandchildren as many bad words as you can when your children aren't around of course! I believe in you. You've got this. Be THAT granny 😂

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founding

Folding some of your fears together, I find my greatest potential despair: spending too much time with my kids and not working enough to amount to anything as a writer// writing too much and missing critical time with my kids // spending too much time trying to become a successful writer and so missing my kids and also never becoming a successful writer.

Also, my kids driving cars.

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but also you can teach them tennis right?

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1. That I’ll throw a baby off a cliff or balcony

2. That I’ll hit someone in the head with a plate or tray

3. That they’ll try to make me a manager at work.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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Balconies, the safety railings are just never high or substantial enough?

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1. Missing out on dog pics over on Notes

2. Getting murderized by my tiny angel, who sometimes tries to kill me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=3qf3RBfuSZM

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As usual, my husband asks what I’m laughing at and my response is, “Alex Dobrenko’s newsletter.” The lol moment might have been not being as successful as Adam Sandler.

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1. Dementia.

1. Dementia.

2.

3. love u 2

1. Dementia.

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Top fear is being homeless

Second top fear is my kids dying before I do

Third fear is my appointment at "Anytime Fitness" tomorrow. (This one has subfears, like they'll pressure me hard so I'll sign up even if it's not my thing. Or that I'll like it and sign up but never go. Or that I'll economize by joining the local community center instead, then never go.)

Fourth fear is that I will stay mired in my hideous recent cycle of self-doubt, self-flagellation, self-contempt, etc.

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How do you manage to get your wife to read your posts, that's amazing. Props to Lauren :)

Mine doesn't, but on the bright side, it means I can shamelessly exaggerate everything about her on substack for the lols

I'm definitely scared of death and also the practicality of it, like my body either decomposing into the ground or burning into a thick coffin. I kind of visualise this a lot.

Scared of cancer/ebola/aids/bubonic plague

Scared of flying. (Yes, I know it's the safest mode of transportation yadi yada)

Scared of that Sardinian cheese with the living worms in it

Scared that the universe is expanding

Scared of my wife/her mum, my mum/her mum

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Omg what a great idea I should make my own list but most of your list is my list so maybe don’t need to bother.

My favorite: “both not being true.”

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For all of you worrying about being good dads.

My father was a contrarian jackass who spent his 30s living on the street in an alcoholic stupor. Even after he sobered up, he could be difficult.

And I still miss him.

Maybe not every day (it has been 25 years) but at odd times, I'll see something and think Jimmy would have loved this!

When Trump got elected, I could hear my father coming back from his grave to rant about him. When my niece graduated college, I knew how proud he would be.

Despite everything I knew he loved me.

And I miss him.

So if I can still grieve the most difficult man and the worst conventional father in history, I think all of you are safe.

😁

Your worst problem is going to be maintaining the high standards you're setting.

And the teenage years. You have to live until the kids are 20+.

But you can do it.

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My fearsharing list for Alex, as of today:

- Missing out on all the black Friday sales

- Buying shit on Black Friday and then imagining it going into a giant pile of trash that ends up as a tsunami of garbage that kills every human in 2034

- Being too high, too often

- Thinking my cold fingers are a sign of a dreaded, killer disease

- Oh, and that one day I'll be dead.

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I think you’re “in your bag” writing lists. Bloody brilliant.

Glad you wrote this :) so much good stuff

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The list is pretty universal. We can all sit around quietly and suddenly blurt out #49!! Everyone will just wring their hands in silent commiseration.

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I actually love this idea, Alex! Hallmark will stupidly pass on it... and I will embrace it.

After carefully considering each of your fears, I want to say the only one you really should be afraid of is "never doing stand up".

The best part of doing stand up is that EVERYBODY SUCKS AT IT at first... and then, slowly they discover their tight five and boom... off to YouTube... and then slowly, one day... POOF, your own Netflix special. After failing and refining your jokes for fucking ever of course.

In the meantime... thank you for sharing your spirit here on Da Stacks.

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