As a fellow (kinda sorta maybe recovering) internet addict, this one really hit home for me. The ending is, indeed, a revelation. I loved reading about your day with Wilder, it felt wholly different than some of your past stories. Even the writing itself seems to have a little something extra, maybe more sharpness and clarity. Whatever it is, I’m just happy to hear about your happiness 🖤
This makes me think of a post Summer Brennan wrote back in the spring and that stuck with me. She's talking about an interview with the poet, Marie Howe and a writing exercise to just write what you observe, with no metaphor, and how fucking hard that is. It's so hard just to observe what's around us. It's so hard to be present. Here's how she says it, "To observe the world, you have to be present in the world, and a writer must do this in a way that is quite painful for most people. It hurts to be present. It is very hard."
I think about the truth of that so much. The reason escaping to the internet or alcohol or chocolate or whatever your addiction is--the reason that's so tempting is because being in the present hurts. You feel all the things. Ugh. It's a lot. I mean, it's all we have, but we still resist the hell out of it.
I think this says most of what I have been thinking about the siren songs of the internet and Alex's experiment.
The internet and its infinite distractions are just another way not to be present. A few years ago, when I was still going into an office for work, all of my work was web-based, so I was all internet all the time. And I was burned out, so I veered off to shop, play games, Facebook, down shiny rabbit holes.
I felt guilty about it, and not, because it was excruciating to be present. I wasn't drinking, but I was pretty checked out.
All very true, Teri. When I'm aware, I know that I reach for my phone to scroll mostly when I'm feelin anxious, even though I know my phone is not going to do anything to help me feel less anxious. It will, however, allow me to escape the unpleasantness of that moment.
"Watch this". 🐈 this was brilliant and real and made me laugh and cry and my heart was full at the end of it all. Keep telling us more about you offline world.
I'm doing this thing where I'm trying not to sit and mindlessly drink wine and scroll the machine in the evenings. On the days I succeed, I feel more alive, (cause, duh, I am). Sometimes being in the present hurts so much right now. Friends are ill, some dying, my parents, gak, my kids are struggling, the world is imploding. Yet, the sun is out this morning, the air is fresh from last night's storm and I'm alive.
This was quite good! In regard to your last comment/question thingy I think personally I would read just about anything you put out, but that does sound really interesting! I am struggling to partake in this experience because I find a lot of joy in doing some things online, I really like hosting my own server(s) and that requires a lot of googling, but it just gives me so much control in my life. Also pirating is fun I won't lie. I need to sit on this for a while and figure out a good balance, maybe as long as I give up the internet during my normal day, or give it up on my phone? I am unsure but I am sure there is a balance to be made!
ahhhh omg I love doing shit like this! It' what makes the internet fun. I literally yesterday - in response to this whole experiemnt - said to myself, "I should set up a local server at home so I can easily save stuff between computers without going online'
and yes i am also a pirate
i dont wanna and will not give all that stuff up . but none of that is the problem! It's the checking of the bullshit that I wanna stop lol.
I pretty much just try and self host whatever I can, arr suite, file sharing, rss, bookmark, and some archiving software too. Need to find more, and make my homelab more robust. I agree though it is the checking of the bullshit is the issue, I think I have gotten better at it, but sometimes while im at work....ironic. In any case I need to find cooler things to do online, im mainly just apart of small communities of other tech enthusiasts like tilde.club or tilde.town and I just love looking at silly little websites. Open to recs!
my nephew also says “i DO want it” when you say no, like he thinks you’ve misunderstood him and told him he doesn’t, i.e., excuse me, sir, but i must correct the record
Alex, I love this so much. I have been trying really hard to unplug and not be on my phone when I’m with my kids. The magic of those unrecorded after dinner dance parties with the wonderboom is something I know very well. Highly recommend playing the soundtrack to Riverdance for the 2 year olds. Huge hit. Lol
Also I use an app called ClearSpace that has helped me a lot.
Love this post Alex! Taking offline breaks are so important. I have self imposed rules I try to stick to.
1) Offline by 8pm. I am breaking that right now, commenting on your post. It is 8:32 pm in Massachusetts.
2) Don't check the phone in the middle of the night. I get this one done 99/9% of the time.
3) Turn off all APP notifications. Done. I will never turn them back on.
4) Turn off the volume on my phone. I only turn it on if I am expecting an important phone call.
The internet - especially social media is addicting. I studied the effects of technology - the internet - a few years ago and it was eye-opening and downright disturbing. I wish I had learned more when my addiction started way back in the late 90's. Note I am still writing online to this day. But I spend far less time online now that I did for my first 15 years or so online!
As a Professional Toddler Mom, I think “Watch This” would make a great episode of Bluey. I’ll be your agent on this script and shop it around to everyone.
2. “it’s so cute and is, in a way, actually patience but also not really since he does it for about half a second before demanding whatever it is that he wanted...” <-- that is describing most adult prayer in a sentence, especially my own requests
- Earlier today I was working on a “before and after” post for some writing I had edited. And I think the reason I like bonkers messy first drafts is because there’s a side of the writer that almost never makes it to the published draft. It’s like I’m seeing a secret person writing a secret thing in the first draft. Then I wondered what some of your first drafts look like. And what is edited out for the readers’ sake or for your sake or for nobody’s sake.
>> I liked this one, pal. And to echo Erin above, I do think you’re catching more details IRL and pulling them onto the page differently. A+
But seriously, how “first drafty” are your posts usually?
What astounds me is how new all of it is. Our ancestors didn't have it. Our parents didn't have it. If I had an elder brother, he would not have had it. We are the first generation of people to dive into this depth.
In 1954 Olds and Milner connected electrodes to the pleasure centers of living rats and gave them buttons to stimulate those centers. They stopped the experiment before the rats could starve to death, but that was their concern. It is yet unclear, whether the rats would actually starve, since nobody repeated this experiment to this end.
Watch this *sheds a single tear*
As a fellow (kinda sorta maybe recovering) internet addict, this one really hit home for me. The ending is, indeed, a revelation. I loved reading about your day with Wilder, it felt wholly different than some of your past stories. Even the writing itself seems to have a little something extra, maybe more sharpness and clarity. Whatever it is, I’m just happy to hear about your happiness 🖤
This makes me think of a post Summer Brennan wrote back in the spring and that stuck with me. She's talking about an interview with the poet, Marie Howe and a writing exercise to just write what you observe, with no metaphor, and how fucking hard that is. It's so hard just to observe what's around us. It's so hard to be present. Here's how she says it, "To observe the world, you have to be present in the world, and a writer must do this in a way that is quite painful for most people. It hurts to be present. It is very hard."
I think about the truth of that so much. The reason escaping to the internet or alcohol or chocolate or whatever your addiction is--the reason that's so tempting is because being in the present hurts. You feel all the things. Ugh. It's a lot. I mean, it's all we have, but we still resist the hell out of it.
Love Marie Howe & she's so right. Hello Robyn lovely to see you here!
Hey, Robyn! Lovely to see you, too!
I think this says most of what I have been thinking about the siren songs of the internet and Alex's experiment.
The internet and its infinite distractions are just another way not to be present. A few years ago, when I was still going into an office for work, all of my work was web-based, so I was all internet all the time. And I was burned out, so I veered off to shop, play games, Facebook, down shiny rabbit holes.
I felt guilty about it, and not, because it was excruciating to be present. I wasn't drinking, but I was pretty checked out.
All very true, Teri. When I'm aware, I know that I reach for my phone to scroll mostly when I'm feelin anxious, even though I know my phone is not going to do anything to help me feel less anxious. It will, however, allow me to escape the unpleasantness of that moment.
somehow I lost my own comment but yes I want more infinite game content
"Watch this". 🐈 this was brilliant and real and made me laugh and cry and my heart was full at the end of it all. Keep telling us more about you offline world.
I'm doing this thing where I'm trying not to sit and mindlessly drink wine and scroll the machine in the evenings. On the days I succeed, I feel more alive, (cause, duh, I am). Sometimes being in the present hurts so much right now. Friends are ill, some dying, my parents, gak, my kids are struggling, the world is imploding. Yet, the sun is out this morning, the air is fresh from last night's storm and I'm alive.
This was quite good! In regard to your last comment/question thingy I think personally I would read just about anything you put out, but that does sound really interesting! I am struggling to partake in this experience because I find a lot of joy in doing some things online, I really like hosting my own server(s) and that requires a lot of googling, but it just gives me so much control in my life. Also pirating is fun I won't lie. I need to sit on this for a while and figure out a good balance, maybe as long as I give up the internet during my normal day, or give it up on my phone? I am unsure but I am sure there is a balance to be made!
ahhhh omg I love doing shit like this! It' what makes the internet fun. I literally yesterday - in response to this whole experiemnt - said to myself, "I should set up a local server at home so I can easily save stuff between computers without going online'
and yes i am also a pirate
i dont wanna and will not give all that stuff up . but none of that is the problem! It's the checking of the bullshit that I wanna stop lol.
what other cool online stuff do you do
I pretty much just try and self host whatever I can, arr suite, file sharing, rss, bookmark, and some archiving software too. Need to find more, and make my homelab more robust. I agree though it is the checking of the bullshit is the issue, I think I have gotten better at it, but sometimes while im at work....ironic. In any case I need to find cooler things to do online, im mainly just apart of small communities of other tech enthusiasts like tilde.club or tilde.town and I just love looking at silly little websites. Open to recs!
“Online, I am all possibility with no reality, not really...Except that unreality never satisfies. It's designed not to.” Good one!
“You can't win because we've already won. This is it. The infinite.” 🩷
my nephew also says “i DO want it” when you say no, like he thinks you’ve misunderstood him and told him he doesn’t, i.e., excuse me, sir, but i must correct the record
Alex, I love this so much. I have been trying really hard to unplug and not be on my phone when I’m with my kids. The magic of those unrecorded after dinner dance parties with the wonderboom is something I know very well. Highly recommend playing the soundtrack to Riverdance for the 2 year olds. Huge hit. Lol
Also I use an app called ClearSpace that has helped me a lot.
Love this post Alex! Taking offline breaks are so important. I have self imposed rules I try to stick to.
1) Offline by 8pm. I am breaking that right now, commenting on your post. It is 8:32 pm in Massachusetts.
2) Don't check the phone in the middle of the night. I get this one done 99/9% of the time.
3) Turn off all APP notifications. Done. I will never turn them back on.
4) Turn off the volume on my phone. I only turn it on if I am expecting an important phone call.
The internet - especially social media is addicting. I studied the effects of technology - the internet - a few years ago and it was eye-opening and downright disturbing. I wish I had learned more when my addiction started way back in the late 90's. Note I am still writing online to this day. But I spend far less time online now that I did for my first 15 years or so online!
Keep it going Alex!
As a Professional Toddler Mom, I think “Watch This” would make a great episode of Bluey. I’ll be your agent on this script and shop it around to everyone.
2. “it’s so cute and is, in a way, actually patience but also not really since he does it for about half a second before demanding whatever it is that he wanted...” <-- that is describing most adult prayer in a sentence, especially my own requests
- Earlier today I was working on a “before and after” post for some writing I had edited. And I think the reason I like bonkers messy first drafts is because there’s a side of the writer that almost never makes it to the published draft. It’s like I’m seeing a secret person writing a secret thing in the first draft. Then I wondered what some of your first drafts look like. And what is edited out for the readers’ sake or for your sake or for nobody’s sake.
>> I liked this one, pal. And to echo Erin above, I do think you’re catching more details IRL and pulling them onto the page differently. A+
But seriously, how “first drafty” are your posts usually?
The “secret person” of the first draft! This feels so right...
What astounds me is how new all of it is. Our ancestors didn't have it. Our parents didn't have it. If I had an elder brother, he would not have had it. We are the first generation of people to dive into this depth.
In 1954 Olds and Milner connected electrodes to the pleasure centers of living rats and gave them buttons to stimulate those centers. They stopped the experiment before the rats could starve to death, but that was their concern. It is yet unclear, whether the rats would actually starve, since nobody repeated this experiment to this end.
Well, we are the rats now, dude.
lmfao "there he was — The Great Gatsby" is killing me
All I know for sure after reading this is that Robert is the unsung hero of this story.
My personal infinite game is to stay alive until I can have robot arms and legs.
Loved this. Thank you 😊
Mmmm I should do this *she thinks as she’s scrolling through the article on her phone*