I don’t really have words but I do remember one time I went through an oil spill of my own while publicly writing and I just ached for someone to throw back the ball and no one would. So here I am throwing back the ball. This sucks, Alex. But yeah, as Isabel said, truck on.
I’m incredibly introverted and don’t comment often but I just wanted to say from one silly person to another, humans and bananas share a significant number of fundamental "housekeeping" genes (around 50% or 25-40% similarity, depending on measurement). I’m thinking about you and hope you laugh soon.
I think you’re onto something with this hotel business… but you gotta think larger! How about GetARoom.com, a place to book hotels and overnight stays? Give Expedia and the others a run for their money, just none of that car rental or flight business because what maniac buys all of their travel necessities from one place?? Nope, that would be a different website- PeaceOfMind.com, not to be confused with PieceOfMind.com which is just a place for venting. There we go, depression can see itself out now, you have 3 perfectly viable new business ideas.
*****Let’s just end here: I know I am lucky, but the best water in the world - the beautiful, goofy kids and amazing, understanding, accepting and beautiful perfect soul human wife, the jobs and friends and parents and family and success, none of it will mix with that oily black of darkness, once it’s in the glass. Half full of water, sure, but even a drop o’ oil can spoil the broth. *****
beautifully stated, and so true. yes you are incredibly lucky AND also you are feeling depressed and overwhelmed and so it's hard to see your beautiful life from down in a hole. Obviously without knowing the reason for weaning the antidepressant, could you maybe add the pro- back to the -zac so that you're not trying to white knuckle this stage? maybe that would help you to climb out of the hole a bit . take care...
also I have seen some writers here add a button to "buy me a coffee etc. " paid subscriptions to anything aren't in the budget but id like to send some appreciation from time to time
Forget about why it's happening and don't fight it---just take care of yourself till you're through it. Please have compassion for yourself. You're just a human being. Sending lots of love and powerful anti-shame rays, B.A. xo
Oh man, I hear you on the weed withdrawal. It is definitely a thing. Another layer when you're feeling covered up with shit. Love that you shared it with us, though. Very relatable move -- 'I'm going to try this thing again and see if it's different this time.' And it is for a short, sweet minute, then it's back to the old, not-working thing. Ugh.
Your writing is real and raw, and I appreciate that about you. I appreciate when poetry creeps into your lament. I appreciate feeling your heart aching while your head is busy naming all there is to be grateful for. Relatable.
I find myself wishing I could give you a quiet hug. No words. No advice.
Then I want to give you advice. And wisdom. I've been there and I made it out. Just like you have, which is what makes it possible for you to write about it, I imagine. This trip to and from the depths is taxing, confounding, and survivable. Hang in there. xx
Depression is depressing. Duh. The rollercoaster ride in its peaks and valleys has always been good for my creative fires and maybe that's the same for you. The pills moderate the drama but fortunately there's still some ideas percolating. December is depressing. Less sunlight, more market driven holiday fever. Pressures and expectations of the festering season, canned Christmas music in supermarket aisles, Jingle Bells raining down from ceiling speakers in a Pho restaurant on December 1. I'm angry, you're angry. What you're doing is hard, carving out your living from your creative practice here. Keep on keeping on, be easy on yourself and I'll be easy on myself.
Sorry you are going through this and really appreciate you sharing. And in case you ever think doing the BATWrite group hasn't been worth it to those of us who participated, I just want you to know I was lying in bed this morning, worried a bit by the fact you hadn't planned any more sessions this month, hoping it was just the winter/not enough light/ holiday blahs--which iI assure you is s a real diagnosable thing (smile). But I was also thinking exactly how I was going to mention you and the group in my novella acknowledgments because that dratted book draft is done, out being beta read, and very well might be published by mid January!! So thanks, and Big virtual hugs.
I’ve been sober a week also. It’s pretty stark and raw. I kind of love it but it’s a lot harder than zipping up and down with my usual stuff. I like that we’re doing this in parallel. I will call you with no expectation.
I don’t really have words but I do remember one time I went through an oil spill of my own while publicly writing and I just ached for someone to throw back the ball and no one would. So here I am throwing back the ball. This sucks, Alex. But yeah, as Isabel said, truck on.
I’m incredibly introverted and don’t comment often but I just wanted to say from one silly person to another, humans and bananas share a significant number of fundamental "housekeeping" genes (around 50% or 25-40% similarity, depending on measurement). I’m thinking about you and hope you laugh soon.
You say the things that most of us keep hidden within - and that's a good thing. Hang in there, you beautiful wordsmith, you.
I think you’re onto something with this hotel business… but you gotta think larger! How about GetARoom.com, a place to book hotels and overnight stays? Give Expedia and the others a run for their money, just none of that car rental or flight business because what maniac buys all of their travel necessities from one place?? Nope, that would be a different website- PeaceOfMind.com, not to be confused with PieceOfMind.com which is just a place for venting. There we go, depression can see itself out now, you have 3 perfectly viable new business ideas.
*****Let’s just end here: I know I am lucky, but the best water in the world - the beautiful, goofy kids and amazing, understanding, accepting and beautiful perfect soul human wife, the jobs and friends and parents and family and success, none of it will mix with that oily black of darkness, once it’s in the glass. Half full of water, sure, but even a drop o’ oil can spoil the broth. *****
beautifully stated, and so true. yes you are incredibly lucky AND also you are feeling depressed and overwhelmed and so it's hard to see your beautiful life from down in a hole. Obviously without knowing the reason for weaning the antidepressant, could you maybe add the pro- back to the -zac so that you're not trying to white knuckle this stage? maybe that would help you to climb out of the hole a bit . take care...
also I have seen some writers here add a button to "buy me a coffee etc. " paid subscriptions to anything aren't in the budget but id like to send some appreciation from time to time
Keep on trucking 🧉
source: I love you
Forget about why it's happening and don't fight it---just take care of yourself till you're through it. Please have compassion for yourself. You're just a human being. Sending lots of love and powerful anti-shame rays, B.A. xo
Oh man, I hear you on the weed withdrawal. It is definitely a thing. Another layer when you're feeling covered up with shit. Love that you shared it with us, though. Very relatable move -- 'I'm going to try this thing again and see if it's different this time.' And it is for a short, sweet minute, then it's back to the old, not-working thing. Ugh.
Your writing is real and raw, and I appreciate that about you. I appreciate when poetry creeps into your lament. I appreciate feeling your heart aching while your head is busy naming all there is to be grateful for. Relatable.
I find myself wishing I could give you a quiet hug. No words. No advice.
Then I want to give you advice. And wisdom. I've been there and I made it out. Just like you have, which is what makes it possible for you to write about it, I imagine. This trip to and from the depths is taxing, confounding, and survivable. Hang in there. xx
Depression is depressing. Duh. The rollercoaster ride in its peaks and valleys has always been good for my creative fires and maybe that's the same for you. The pills moderate the drama but fortunately there's still some ideas percolating. December is depressing. Less sunlight, more market driven holiday fever. Pressures and expectations of the festering season, canned Christmas music in supermarket aisles, Jingle Bells raining down from ceiling speakers in a Pho restaurant on December 1. I'm angry, you're angry. What you're doing is hard, carving out your living from your creative practice here. Keep on keeping on, be easy on yourself and I'll be easy on myself.
Your depressed parts are welcome here. 💕
Sorry you are going through this and really appreciate you sharing. And in case you ever think doing the BATWrite group hasn't been worth it to those of us who participated, I just want you to know I was lying in bed this morning, worried a bit by the fact you hadn't planned any more sessions this month, hoping it was just the winter/not enough light/ holiday blahs--which iI assure you is s a real diagnosable thing (smile). But I was also thinking exactly how I was going to mention you and the group in my novella acknowledgments because that dratted book draft is done, out being beta read, and very well might be published by mid January!! So thanks, and Big virtual hugs.
I’ve been sober a week also. It’s pretty stark and raw. I kind of love it but it’s a lot harder than zipping up and down with my usual stuff. I like that we’re doing this in parallel. I will call you with no expectation.
I’m reaching out a hand to you. Human connection is a must.
Look the child in the eyes and give it a warm hug
love u alex (u have to say it back)